Something profound happened to me the other day. I realized that I was control. It was a powerful epiphany that knocked right me out of my Nike ID’s and flat on my back on NYC concrete.
My single “Miss America” premiered recently and until its debut I was totally and utterly manic. When faced with a major life event I instinctively create scenarios in my head where “Everybody Hates Malene.” To add insult to injury homeloverfriendartistdude wasn’t hitting me back (I think we may have broken up via the Twitter unfollow button but I’m still not sure), my manager left town (for an impromptu, well-deserved vacation) three days before the jump and the anxiety of how I would be received was driving me batty… mix that in with a touch of PMS and voilà; Malene the Manic.
Meanwhile, I’m a walker and, until recently, like most New Yorkers I had no driver’s license (yeah I said it!). In times of manic episodes I pace and mentally traipse through the halls and winding stairwells of my mind talking myself down from the ledge and smiting every crazy thought ninja creeping through my otherwise rational brain.
So here I was, mentally pacing and physically walking through Brooklyn, obsessing about how my first single would be received. “Miss America” is a huge title, considering that I’m not the natural poster-child for this name. You’re probably expecting an “all American” blond-haired, blue eyed pageant queen in perfectly done makeup. However if you look up at the image up top, you’ll see I’m a Trinidadian-born, Brooklyn-bred naturalized citizen, b-girl turned alt-chic who was raised between the concrete of crack era NYC and the cane fields New Pleasantville, Trinidad & Tobago. This dichotomy is the rub. I realize it takes a lot of chutzpah — which I have – to walk around town calling one’s self Miss America. But I thought about it, it dawned on me…. I am Miss America, the living, breathing, working reality of this country.
We the different, we the working for change, we the creative, we the unconventional, we the honest, we the brown, the yellow, the rainbow, the inked, the pierced, the married, the single, the career driven, we the beautiful, we the renaissance… we the people.
Read the rest over at Parlour!